Tuesday, June 28, 2011

MY FIRST BORN CHILD

I was first married in July of 1953 and am not really sure that we spoke of having children or when but feel it was definitely part of our plans for the future. After we'd been married about 16 months I began to feel unwell and decided I'd best see my very nice old doctor fearing something dreadful was wrong with me. "Well my girl" he said "I think you may be pregnant and you could be in danger of losing the baby so I'll send you to a specialist who will look after you".

This came as somewhat of a shock as I'd not experienced any signs of pregnancy, or what I understood any such signs should have been. Off I went to see this specialist who turned out to be a delightful man and he said that indeed I was pregnant and in danger of losing this baby, that I should stop work immediately and rest up as much as possible for the next month or so.

I followed all these instructions carefully and after an 8 month pregnancy I was delivered of a beautiful baby girl that weighed in at 5lbs 8oz (don't ask me to put them into grams), was 18 inches long and had almost no hair and definitely nor eyebrows or eyelashes.

I had heard tales of being in labour but I woke at about 3a.m. and knew something wasn't right. Called a friend who had had a baby 6 weeks previously who said she thought I was beginning labour. My then husband actually drove down to our GP and asked what to do. "Get your wife to the hospital" was the barked reply. Off to the hospital, water broke going up the front steps of the building and to make a short story even shorter...the baby was born at 5.30a.m. Just as well I got there in time!!!

Had a modern doctor who said it was OK for me to walk to my room and after breakfast I could have a shower. I was the envy of nearly all the other new mums on the ward as their doctors made them stay in bed for at least a week after giving birth and we all stayed in hospital for 10 days before being allowed home.

Now for the difference between then and back then. I was a smoker and continued smoking right through my pregnancy. That first morning I noticed my room mate lighting a cigarette and I asked the nurse (they were all nuns in that hospital in those days) if I should perhaps give up smoking now I had a baby. Her answer would astound people today and was as follows:
"Oh no dear, don't even think about giving up smoking. The shock of doing so could make you lose your milk!" That is honest truth and so I continued to smoke and through my second pregnancy as well at which time I had another premature birth. Was it the smoking that caused that to happen I wonder. Today those that know such things would say yes for sure but I was heading for toxemia and my specialist felt it was Mother Nature's way of saving the baby and perhaps me as well in having them born early.

My little baby was so special and as she grew her little eyelashes popped out and her hair began to grow and she had beautiful pale pink skin and everyone adored her. She unfortunately suffered from severe wind pains for the first couple of months but only during the evening and at other times she was very good. Once I got her to sleep she would usually sleep through the night so I can't complain of losing sleep or any of those things that often happen to new mums. Has perhaps distance lead enchantment? No, I don't believe it has because I can't remember having a bad pregnancy once I knew I was actually pregnant nor real problems with the baby (apart from that nightly colic).

My little girl grew up did well at school, had some nice friends and was generally a happy child. She eventually decided she'd like to leave school and get a job and then she met a boy and they got married and had a little girl of their own who was also a beautiful baby. My daughter has since remarried and had three more lovely children and is married to a wonderful man which makes me feel so happy but...........

I have suffered with arthritis most of my life and once I reached about 60 years of age it began to get rapidly worse and by the time I was 65 I began to have injections to help relieve it. Now at 79 I can only walk a very short distance and stand for but a few minutes before the pain sets in. This though is not about me....it is about that girl I love so much. She is 23 years younger than me but is already suffering much of the pain I suffer and with so much of her life still ahead of her I can feel the mental pain she is suffering when she wonders what the next years have in store for her. If there was only some miracle cure that could make her life free of pain and give her the ability to be able to get out and about and enjoy her life. I can only hope that some new drug without nasty side affects will come along to help her.

I just hope she will not give up. She has so much ability and a lot to offer and there are things she can do without mobility but when pain becomes severe it does affect one's abilities to do things. Don't give up but just keep hoping that before too long things will improve and you will be mobile once again and at least reasonably free of pain.


2 comments:

  1. Thank you for this lovely post Mum, I too hope that I will get some relief and be able to live some of my dreams before I am too house-bound. But what will be will be and I am surrounded by lots of love so that always helps. xxx

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  2. I didn't have any baby pics to post but now I have the scanner up and running and if I can remember how to use it you may see some of those pics on here. You know how much I love you and how it saddens me to know of and see your pain. Just never give up 'cos you never know what is around the corner in life. xxx

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